wallace-l: DFW suicide?

[RS]

http://www.abcnews.go.com/ThisWeek/story?id=5746532

 

the video is down a bit L

 

From: wallace-l-bounces at waste.org [mailto:wallace-l-bounces at waste.org] On
Behalf Of zengirl at rcn.com
Sent: Monday, September 15, 2008 12:42 PM
To: Joe Nickerson
Cc: wallace-l
Subject: Re: wallace-l: DFW suicide?

 

Until now, I was someone who would probably have made fun of people who took
the death of a famous person (vs. a "real" friend) so personally.  But I
feel "bone-marrow-deep depressed" about this, too.  I'm one of many who
feels that he changed, and even saved, my life.  I wish that someone could
have done the same for him.  

 

I think that DFW would be pleased to know that he had so many "ideal
readers"--the kind that achieved a true intimacy with, in, and through his
words.  I've never forgotten that a wise counselor at a rehab facility once
told me that "addiction is an intimacy disorder," and I've long believed
that the kind of mindfulness DFW advocated in his Kenyon speech is the way
out of such disorders, whether they take the form of addiction, neurosis,
depression, or anything else.  To honor him, I will try harder to live in
that kind of mindful state.  Silver linings are usually so bogus, but I'm
also going to try to try harder with my own writing now; for years I've been
lazy, and often relied on the no-longer-available-excuse that there was no
point in struggling so much with my writing because DFW says everything I
want to say, only far better.  Maybe if each of us, in our own ways, tries a
bit harder to live as DFW suggested, there would at least be an epilogue
that would mitigate this gut-wrenching feeling we have now that we've
reached the end of this tragic story.  

 

On Sep 15, 2008, at 10:51 AM, Joe Nickerson wrote:





I have taken quite a bit of consolation from each and every post - however,
am I alone in feeling deeply, deeply disturbed and bone-marrow-deep
depressed and despondent? 

 

Aside from family members, I have never felt such sorrow related to the
death of someone I did not personally know - though, perhaps that is not
entirely accurate. Given the depth of emotion and human decency David often
shared, and the extent to which I often live in my own head, on some level,
I perhaps had a deeper, more intimate relationship with Wallace than I had
or have with friends and family - both living and deceased.  

 

It is with a profound sense of sadness for David, as both a person and a
writer, that I feel safe in stating we may never see the likes of him again
- at least not within my lifetime. People like him, folks who seem to posses
a preternatural ability to look at life and see through the bullshit, don't
come around too often - and what's worse, they appear to be leaving this
planet at an ever-increasing pace. Wallace was (and is) my Twain, that
terrifyingly gifted writer and thinker whose novel's and essay's contain,
within, the promise of redemption. 

 

Ugh - 

 

joe

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