Christian's Tips on Learning to Live with Pain, or, Living a Happier Gaming Life

• Play Role-playing Games. Better yet, do Live-action.
• If you're playing AD&D, make sure you have a "funny" DM who appreciates the finer points of gaming, such as plaid ogres.
• Remember: the more different shapes of dice you need, the better the game is.
• Picking your friends' pockets is fun for all.
• Before trying anything else, attempt physical violence. It may not work, but it'll be fun!
• You know you are subtle if you have ever used the phrase "Nudge, nudge..." in a real-life situation.
• If the Cheetos are starting to stain your fingers, try switching to non-orange snacks for a week or two. If a rash persists, seek medical treatment or, alternatively, rinse with Mountain Dew.
• Always use all of your abilities whenever possible. That rock just might be evil.
• When the great Cthulhu awakens and rises from sunken R'lyeh, he will spare his campaign workers. Yeah...that's the ticket...
• No matter what anyone else says, (insert stereotype here) are always cool.
• Chaotic neutral thieves
• Paladins
• Anti-paladins
• Ventrue mobsters
• Brujah mobsters
• Gangrel wanderers
• Ravnos Ren-fest refugees
• rogue Tremere
• Goofy Malkavians that are lucid when it suits them
• Toreador martial artists (unless they use wussy Aikido)
• Using player knowledge is a-okay. If you weren't meant to know, you wouldn't have been told.
• In a live-action game, only losers make an attempt to costume. Make sure to impress everyone with your snappy dressing by wearing your normal clothes.
• The best way to deal with a problem is to always resort to killing other characters. That way, everyone will fear your character, and no one will ever cross you.