Drugs

[RICHARD ROMEO]

Cal-

I've been away for a few weeks and don't know all the details about the 
present discussion on drugs et al but I wanted to drop you a line 
agreeing with what you say.  I admit that I got into mind-alteration for 
the wrong reasons (never heroin though thank god or acid which I beleive 
would have driven me insane-mescaline was bad enough).  So my view on 
these things is yes they were great and they alleviated much pains, but I 
became somebody who as I look on it now as someone to despise (I only 
drink wine at the present time).
What attracted me to literature was in some sense not even the works 
themselves but the writers and their drunken exploits (I would add I 
hated books in college at least what one would call literature).  Later 
after almost OD'ing on coke, my interest in literature began (after 
college).  But I fell into the trap of the imitating Christ syndrome and 
began to indulge once more (this was two years ago-mostly hash and weed). 
 I began to write (mostly poetry) and fueled by excess, created.  
However, all this took a toll as chemically induced inspiration does.  
When one begins to see oneself going further and further down the slide 
of life for the purpose of artistic creation and feeding it and knowing 
its wrong but doing it anyway, well who's fault is that.  Much of my 
anger became phony (as much of society's is as well).  
Anyway, my point is I am very wary of that cool-hip-rebel persona so much 
prevalent today.  I feel I know where these people are coming from only 
because I've been there myself.  It saddens me where some of these lives 
lead.  Reading GR and Under the Volcano for the third time brought some 
really bad shit back.  I still love the writing but I'm seeing it from a 
different point of view and i am not so impressed as I was when 
approaching it for the first time.  I think of myself now as the 
character Otto in The Recognitions finally realizing that he has to start 
all over again.  So if those hipsters start laying that line down (here 
in NYC it's a cottage industry), I prefer to politely withdraw.  My 
advice such that it is is that these people will not get it until they 
scare themselves-see Bob Dylan (Pirate's claim of cheap nihilism-that's 
what they personify) or kill themselves-see Kurt Cobain.  Only when you 
really know you're going to die as I did looking in that mirror 10 years 
ago and are spared only to sin again as I did does one finally get the 
message.
Maybe they think writing or creating or seeking visions under the 
influence is necessary.  Well, to quote Steely Dan-"by a blackened wall, 
he does it all, and he thinks he's died and gone to heaven-see the glory 
of the Royal Scam".  I don't regret what I did in the past but "I'm so 
much younger now"...thanks for listening

P.S.  My inferno poem masterwork (hah) is called The Rape of the Lock, 
Dylan Rebels, and other Notes on the Death of Nirvana-the eternal pain in 
a rock and roll bar.

rich (with the funny name) romeo
nyc