Like Ebonics? As i-if?

[LBernier at tribune.com]

So, I was, like, driving around in my totally gnarly beemer? that Daddy gave me 
after I, like, totally flaked? and hit that pole? because this, like, RIPPED 
dude, like, walked by on the sidewalk?  and he had his shirt off?  and like, 
DUH, of course I had to look and oops, there went the front end of the little 
miata? but anyway, the radio was on? and this guy was talking about something 
called ebonics? like where their going to teach to black kids? in their dialect 
or something? and I said, well GOD, I mean, I get like NO respect cause some 
totally dweeboid people like think I talk funny?!? And like they don't 
understand what I'm saying?  Where's my special education class, huh???  
Puh-lease!!!

Jean, who actually drives around in a rusting 8-year old Honda Civic Station 
Wagon named Sigurd, for no particular reason.

Bonne fete d'annee nouveax foakes!

or, simply, SKOL!!!