Jules deliberately misleads

[Jules Siegel]

At 12:22 PM 05/13/97 PST, <MASCARO at humnet.ucla.edu> wrote:
>It's time that you admit that Dale told me my permission was needed.

Dale was not authorized to use the word permission. I corrected him immediately.

>And this occurred even before you asked Andrew for his.

Wrong. Andrew volunteered his permission when I first contacted him after
Gierland at aol.com suggested privately to me that I do a book. Andrew's
material was mostly sent to me as private e-mail and is used rather
extensively. It would be very hard to justify as fair use. Yours would be
pretty easy, but I did want to make sure that you got a chance to take out
anything you found really embarrassing and to add some clarifications if you
wished.

>Now I know you have whupped Dale good and hard for being so naively honest
as to admit he needed my permission.

Dale was mistaken, not naive. I didn't whup him real good. I just sent
One-Eyed Louie to his house to whistle ominously. Moreover, he was
negotiating in my behalf. Under the terms of my contract with him, all
responsibility for copyright permission is mine.

If I felt I needed your permission I would have asked for it. Actually, the
correspondence with you about this only began because I wanted to use some
private e-mail you sent me. Somehow I started feeling a little sentimental
and decided to let you see what I had done with your words.

Your response to this made me decide not to make the same mistake again with
the rest of the Anal Retentive Support Group, whose drooling questions to
Chrissie were so revealing of their own dark inner secrets that I know
they're going to have to wear pig masks in public after the book comes out.

>I still have Dale's post, but since it is a private mail, I haven't used
it. Should I? 

If we want to show the folks some private e-mail here, how about your first
letter enthusiastically volunteering permission and wishing me well with
Italian applause from The Waste Land thrown in for good measure?

>Yes it is true that you threatened to pillory me if I didn't go along with
your plans. I am glad you are proud of that threat. It is a very ethical way
to treat people whose work inspired you to the astounding literary heights,
soon to be even higher! you have 
attained.

I didn't threaten to pillory you, just make fun of you a little. Peter
Giordano I will pillory when I get around to it. I can just see him with his
head hanging out of the pillory while all the people with late book notices
throw snowballs with rocks in them at him. Massachusetts is perfect for
this, so historically correct and all. Neither Los Angeles nor Philadelphia
is quite right.

>>I also suggested to Dale that we encourage Mascaro to sue and then blow it
up into a gigantic publicity smear: "UCLA Prof Sues to Censor Internet
Book." Dale said he didn't want to do this because he is a sissy. These were
his exact words: "I am a sissy, Jules, and I don't want to get in a fight
because Mascaro is a tough guy from East Phillie and he might spit on my new
bunny pajamas."

>Well, I may sue you now as this is doubly libelous.  First, there is no
such place as *East  Phillie* [sic], and second, Dale's pj's have reindeer
on them, not bunnies.

Ha-HAH! Got you now. [1] You admit you're from nowhere. [2] Dale doesn't
even have either reindeer or bunny pajamas. I just made that up to get even
with him for using the word permission without prior authorization. And he
isn't a sissy either, but a big, rough Ken Kesey logger-type from the State
of Washington. You should see his Eddie Bauer boots. His father lives in a
Winnebago trailer and has a pick-up truck with a double rifle rack, too.

>But you got one thing right, bro,  I told all my beautiful women students
about the book and they're just (insert emoticon of Rolling Stones
soundtrack) dyyyyyyiung to meet you. Show up at the staute

Is this near the Law Library? Am I looking for some kind of bronze scroll?

>of the Big Bad Bruin next Thursday.  Wear a disguise so I'l recognize you.
I'll be the one walking toward you with all of the naked coeds in tow.  If
we're not there, prosceed without us, we'll catch up.

How about the new Playboy male Bunny costume that I am designing for them
because of all the complaints about their sexist image? There will be two
versions. One is for Chippendale types, which is quite revealing. The other,
which I frankly prefer (being old and skinny), is kind of like a fireman's
blue serge dress uniform, except the buttons and cap have sterling silver
Playboy Bunny ornaments. I actually priced a uniform ($175 in 1970) and was
going to have them put the buttons on it (you could then get them at the
Playboy Shop in their building in Chicago) and wear it to the Mansion, but I
made the mistake of telling my editor and he started shrieking and crying
and begging me not to do it, so I gave up the idea. This is a true story,
believe it or not.

--
Professional English-Language Editorial Services
Jules Siegel http://www.caribe.net.mx/siegel/jsiegel.htm
>From US: http://www.yucatanweb.com/siegel/jsiegel.htm
Apdo 1764 Cancun Q. Roo 77501 Tel 011-52-98 87-49-18 Fax 87-49-13