Metalist: House of Cards (was1984 Foreword

[joeallonby]

on 5/15/03 11:17 AM, pynchonoid at pynchonoid at yahoo.com wrote:

> --- David Morris <fqmorris at yahoo.com> wrote:
>> And Doug has been caught
>> playing the multiple personalities in the past.
> 
> False.  Yes, I've been accused of being Dave Monroe,
> Barbara, and any number of other people.   Absolutely
> untrue. 
> 
I find it surprising that you have never been accused of being me.

In fact, I'm disappointed.

I feel a little bit like a few of the old Black Panthers and Yippies that I
met in college who suffered from subpoena envy.

>What! You got subpoenaed? I never got subpoenaed. Why not me? What did you ever
do? I really did conspire to break federal laws. C'mon! I MET Bobby Seale.
No shit! Really! He said "Hey, brother." to me and I'm white. How cool is
that? In fact, according to modern RICO and Patriot Act statutes I actually
qualify as a terrorist. And YOU got subpoenaed? This shakes my faith in the
whole Congressional unconstitutional hearing thing. Man, what IS this world
coming to? 

Why haven't I been accused of being you? God knows that I've tried. I've
stopped just short of relating the tale of how I "technically" met Fidel
Castro. It's kind of an existential semantics life-defining  stretch for me
to assert that I was actually there as a person. I only wish that there had
been a photographer present fully prepared to capture the moment when Fidel
paused on the sidewalk in Manhattan, surrounded by panicky body guards and
Secret Service agents, to exchange pleasantries with the pretty red-haired
pregnant lady who had stumbled absent-mindedly through the police
barricades. My mother said that Mr Castro seemed really nice and kind of
handsome. She was really embarrassed and flustered while turning beet red.
The two dozen odd shouting men waving guns probably didn't help matters
much. But she claims that he seemed to understand her rapidly blurted out
statement that if it was a boy, she would name him after her brave brother
Joseph who died fighting fascism. It was a real ditz moment for her. That
was how I met Fidel Castro.

Extra points to anyone who can relate this to Pynchon's foreword to 1984.

I challenge Dave Monroe!

Peace
Joe

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