Top Ten Reasons to remain on the Pynchon list

[Keith McMullen]

(10) Phloyd Nightingale
(09) Clark Barton
(08) Donald Dix
(07) Walt Whitman
(06) James Derham
(05) Fray (Friar) Juan de Mena
(04) St. Camillus de Lellis
(03) Richard Angelo
(02) Douglas Millstone, LVN
(01) Sister Paul Mackin
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Male Literary Nurse's Prayer:

  Give me strength and wisdom,
  When others deconstruct;
  A soothing word to speak to them,
  Their readings are so phucked.
  Give me joy and laughter,
  To lift a po-mo soul;
  Pour in me compassion,
  For each logocentric troll.
  Give me gentle, healing posts,
  When P-list patience starts to wear;
  A blessing to those who read me,
  This is a Nurse's prayer.