The Bruces

[Dave Monroe]

PM canes 'rubbish' postmodern teaching
Steve Lewis and Imre Salusinszky
April 21, 2006

JOHN Howard believes the postmodern approach to
literature being taught in schools is "rubbish" and is
considering tying education funding to ending the
"gobbledegook" taught in some states.

The Prime Minister made the threat after accusing the
state education authorities of "dumbing down" the
English syllabus and succumbing to political
correctness.

"I feel very, very strongly about the criticism that
many people are making that we are dumbing down the
English syllabus," Mr Howard said.

Australia's most distinguished literary scholar,
Leonie Kramer, yesterday agreed with the Prime
Minister's criticism of how English is taught in high
schools. Dame Leonie, professor emeritus in Australian
literature at the University of Sydney, said what
worried her was "the notion that you have to read, let
us say Shakespeare, in relation to contemporary
preoccupations such as race and class"....

http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/story/0,20867,18878087-601,00.html

Giles Auty: Top Marx for our educators
Marxism should not keep infiltrating the English
curriculum
April 21, 2006

NOT long after the collapse of communism in eastern
Europe, I was lunching in London with a fellow
journalist when a third colleague approached us. "Have
you heard they have just tracked down the last
communist cells to exist anywhere in the world?" he
asked. "You would never guess where they were located:
in Beverly Hills, the BBC building and the staff rooms
of our universities." At which our source of supposed
information departed, hugely amused with himself.

I recalled this silly interlude yesterday while
scanning some of the apposite remarks made about
education by our Prime Minister on ABC radio in
Brisbane (see Cut & Paste). John Howard is absolutely
correct in seeing post-modernist influence behind the
dumbing-down of the English syllabus and in the
growing disrespect shown for significant literature.
But does he - or most parents - appreciate fully the
extent to which Marxist ideology hides behind the mask
of postmodernism? ....

http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/story/0,20867,18874034-7583,00.html

Cut to close-up of a real knee. Arrow superimposed
painting to knee.

Voice Over: Number eight. The kneecap.

Pull back to reveal the knee belongs to First Bruce,
an Australian in full Australian outback gear. We
briefly hear a record of 'Waltzing Mathilda'. He is
sitting in a very hot, slightly dusty room with low
wicker chairs, a table in the middle, big centre fan,
and old fridge.

Second Bruce: Goodday, Bruce!

First Bruce: Oh, Hello Bruce!

Third Bruce: How are yer Bruce?

First Bruce: Bit crook, Bruce.

Second Bruce: Where's Bruce?

First Bruce: He's not here, Bruce.

Third Bruce: Blimey, s'hot in here, Bruce.

First Bruce: S'hot enough to boil a monkey's bum!

Second Bruce: That's a strange expression, Bruce.

First Bruce: Well Bruce, I heard the Prime Minister
use it. S'hot enough to boil a monkey's bum in 'ere,
your Majesty,' he said and she smiled quietly to
herself.

Third Bruce: She's a good Sheila, Bruce and not at all
stuck up.

Second Bruce: Ah, here comes the Bossfella now! - how
are you, Bruce?

Enter fourth Bruce with English person, Michael

Fourth Bruce: Goodday, Bruce, Hello Bruce, how are
you, Bruce? Gentlemen, I'd like to introduce a chap
from pommie land... who'll be joining us this year
here in the Philosophy Department of the University of
Woolamaloo.

All: Goodday.

Fourth Bruce: Michael Baldwin - this is Bruce. Michael
Baldwin - this is Bruce. Michael Baldwin - this is
Bruce.

First Bruce: Is your name not Bruce, then?

Michael: No, it's Michael.

Second Bruce: That's going to cause a little
confusion.

Third Bruce: Mind if we call you 'Bruce' to keep it
clear?

Fourth Bruce: Well, Gentlemen, I think we'd better
start the meeting. Before we start, though, I'll ask
the padre for a prayer.

First Bruce snaps a plastic dog-collar round his neck.
They all lower their heads.

First Bruce: Oh Lord, we beseech thee, have mercy on
our faculty, Amen!!

All: Amen!

Fourth Bruce: Crack the tubes, right! (Third Bruce
starts opening beer cans) Er, Bruce, I now call upon
you to welcome Mr. Baldwin to the Philosophy
Department.

Second Bruce: I'd like to welcome the pommy bastard to
God's own earth, and I'd like to remind him that we
don't like stuck-up sticky-beaks here.

All: Hear, hear! Well spoken, Bruce!

Fourth Bruce: Now, Bruce teaches classical philosophy,
Bruce teaches Haegelian philosophy, and Bruce here
teaches logical positivism, and is also in charge of
the sheep-dip.

Third Bruce: What's does new Bruce teach?

Fourth Bruce: New Bruce will be teaching political
science - Machiavelli, Bentham, Locke, Hobbes,
Sutcliffe, Bradman, Lindwall, Miller, Hassett, and
Benet.

Second Bruce: Those are cricketers, Bruce!

Fourth Bruce: Oh, spit!

Third Bruce: Howls of derisive laughter, Bruce!

Fourth Bruce: In addition, as he's going to be
teaching politics, I've told him he's welcome to teach
any of the great socialist thinkers, provided he makes
it clear that they were wrong.

http://www.pythonland.com/episode22.php#2

http://www.ibras.dk/montypython/episode22.htm#2

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