excerpt from AD via gaddis-l

[Erik T. Burns]

according to steven moore over at the gaddis list, this is an excerpt
from _Against the Day_...

The new Penguin Press catalog has an excerpt from Pynchon's "Against
the Day," which I thought I'd transcribe for you:

Back in 1899, not long after the terrible cyclone that year which
devastated the town, Young Willis Turnstone, freshly credentialed from
the American School of Osteopathy, had set out westward from
Kirksville, Missouri, with a small grip holding a change of personal
linen, an extra shirt, a note of encouragement from Dr. A. T. Still,
and an antiquated Colt in whose use he was far from practiced,
arriving at length in Colorado, where one day riding across the
Uncompahgre plateau he was set upon by a small band of pistoleros.
"Hold it right there, Miss, let's have a look at what's in that
attractive valise o'yours."
"Not much," said Willis.
"Hey, what's this? Packing some iron here! Well, well, never let it be
said Jimmy Drop and his gang denied a tender soul a fair shake now,
little lady, you just grab ahold of your great big pistol and we'll
get to it, shall we." The others had cleared a space which Willis and
Jimmy now found themselves alone at either end of, in classic
throwdown posture. "Go on ahead, don't be shy, I'll give you ten
seconds gratis, 'fore I draw. Promise." Too dazed to share entirely
the gang's spirit of innocent fun, Willis slowly and inexpertly raised
his revolver, trying to aim it as straight as a shaking pair of hands
would allow. After a fair count of ten, true to his word and fast as a
snake, Jimmy went for his own weapon, had it halfway up to working
level before abruptly coming to a dead stop, frozen into an ungainly
crouch. "Oh, pshaw!" the badman screamed, or words to that effect.
"Ay! Jefe, jefe," cried his lieutenant Alfonsito, "tell us it ain'
your back again."
"Damned idiot, o' course it's my back. Oh mother of all
misfortune--and worst than last time too."
"I can fix that," offered Willis.
"Beg your pardon, what in hell business of any got-damn pinkinroller'd
this be, again?"
"I know how to loosen that up for you. Trust me, I'm an osteopath."
"It's O.K., we're open-minded, couple boys in the outfit are
evangelicals, just watch where you're putting them lilywhites
now--yaaagghh--I mean, huh?"
"Feel better?"
"Holy Toledo," straightening up, carefully but pain-free.
"Why, it's a miracle."
"Gracias a Dios!" screamed the dutiful Alfonsito.
"Obliged," Jimmy guessed, sliding his pistol back in its holster.