Malcolm Tucker, My Favorite Scot is back

[rich]

I love this guy

http://www.guardian.co.uk/tv-and-radio/tvandradioblog/2009/oct/15/thick-of-it-malcolm-tucker

Our ten favourite Tucker quotes

• Responding to knock at his door: "Come the fuck in or fuck the fuck off."

• Tucker's Law (out-take from the Spinners & Losers special): "If some
cunt can fuck something up, that cunt will pick the worst possible
time to fucking fuck it up cause that cunt's a cunt."

• Moaning about minister on the phone: "He's about as much use as a
marzipan dildo."

• To a pair of rival advisors: "Laurel and fucking Hardy! Glad you
could join us. Did you manage to get that piano up the stairs OK?"

• Dressing down MP, Geoff Holhurst: "You're so back-bench, you've
actually fucking fallen off. You're out by the fucking bins where I
put you."

• Commenting on Ben Swain's disastrous Newsnight appearance: "All
these hands all over the place! You were like a sweaty octopus trying
to unhook a bra."

• Bollocking a communications department employee: "How much fucking
shit is there on the menu and what fucking flavour is it?"

• Advising minister Hugh Abbot to keep up with the zeitgeist: "You've
got 24 hours to sort out your policy on EastEnders, right? Or you're
for the halal butchers."

• Note passed to assistant Jamie during meeting with blue-sky thinker
Julius Nicholson: "Please could you take this note, ram it up his
hairy inbox and pin it to his fucking prostate."

• Admonishing junior adviser Ollie Reeder to respect government
property: "Feet off the furniture you Oxbridge twat, you're not on a
punt now."