Not South Park

[Robin Landseadel]

> ----- Original Message ----- From: "alice wellintown" <alicewellintown at gmail.com 
> >
> To: <pynchon-l at waste.org>
> Sent: Friday, September 11, 2009 7:30 PM
> Subject: Re: Not South Park
>
>
>> I gave up on baby logic when I left the convent. Try reading the  
>> article.

The author [Jesse Hicks] kinda liked season eight, but thinks Parker &  
Stone aren't Voltiare. Surprise surprise.

And Pynchon still ain't South Park:

	BLOND YOUNG SHERLOCK HOLMES: So, what do you do?
	
	ME: I'm a TV writer.
	
	BYSH: (IMMEDIATELY) I don't watch TV. Really, I don't even own
	a TV.

	Okay, look, I'm fine with people never watching TV. They're lying,
	but I understand. I don't watch that much TV myself. But why do
	people at parties feel such smug delight at telling you (okay, me),
	without hesitation, that they don't watch TV? If you met a dentist at
	a party, would you announce that you don't brush your teeth?
	Would you tell a structural engineer that you don't ride in
	elevators?

	I get it. The TV consciencious objector is just establishing
	intellectual superiority over my highly paid dumb thing. Yeah, I'm
	no stranger to "I don't watch TV." But this time, as an experiment, I
	swallowed my annoyance.

	ME: Yeah, TV is lame. Um, what do you do?

	BYSH: I'm a post-doctoral student in English.

(Notice here that I did not say back to him, "I don't read books in  
English. Really, I don't even own a dictionary.")

	ME: Awesome. That's so cool. What do you, I don't know, study?

	BYSH: Well, I just finished writing a book on Thomas Pynchon.

	Blond Young Sherlock Holmes turned out to be a Pynchon nut.
	Loves Pynchon. He's obsessed with him. And, in his obsession, I
	saw an opportunity for revenge on "I don't watch TV" that would
	make me the Jew-fro-ed Moriarty to his Blond Young Sherlock
	Holmes. But first, I had to play dumb, reel him in a little.

	ME: You wrote a book on Thomas Pynchon? Cool. Very cool.
	When does it come out?

	BYSH: Well, it's really an academic book. You wouldn't see it.

	ME: Isn't he like a big recluse or something?

	BYSH: You could say that. I mailed my book to Thomas Pynchon
	himself. But he won't read it. His publisher won't even accept any
	writing based on his work.

	Now, over the Reichenbach Falls.

	ME: I talked to him on the phone today.

	YBSH: Talked to who?

	ME: Thomas Pynchon.

	YBSH: WHAT!?!?

	ME: Yeah, Pynchon LOVES The Simpsons. This is the second
	time he's been on the show. I directed him over the phone from
	New York. He sounds like a New York Grampa. Gruff but sweet.
	Good guy.

	http://nerdworld.blogs.time.com/2009/09/08/true-tales-of-conversational-vengeance/

Sweeeeeet.