Paracultural Calendar for Feb 20

[Mark Thibodeau]

On this day in *1472*, the islands of Orkney and Shetland are pawned by
Norway to Scotland in lieu of a dowry for Margaret of Denmark.

***

Turnabout is fair play on this day in *1725*, when ten Indians are scalped
in their sleep by white settlers in New Hampshire, for the £100 bounty each
scalp would bring.

***

On this day in *1792*, the Postal Service Act, establishing the United
States Post Office Department, is signed by President *George Washington*.
Chaos ensues.

***

On this day in *1809*, the Supreme Court of the USA rules that the federal
government is more powerful than any individual state… especially Rhode
Island.

***

On this day in *1909*, the *Futurist Manifesto
<http://vserver1.cscs.lsa.umich.edu/~crshalizi/T4PM/futurist-manifesto.html>*
is
first published in the French journal Le Figaro.

***

On this day in *1929*, the *Boston Red Sox* announce that they will begin
playing baseball games on Sunday, prompting God to fortify the *Curse of
the Bambino*.

***

On this day in *1933*, Congress repeals the nation's useless and miserably
unsuccessful policy of *Prohibition* against alcohol. Let's hope we don't
have to wait until *2033* before they repeal the nation's useless and
miserably unsuccessful *War On Drugs*.

Also on this day in *1933*, *Adolf Hitler* secretly meets with German
industrialists to arrange for financing of the Nazi Party's upcoming
election campaign.

***

On this day in *1943*, American movie studio executives agree to allow the
Office of War Information to censor movies.

***

On this day in *1959*, the *Avro Arrow* program to design and manufacture
supersonic jet fighters in Canada is cancelled by the *Diefenbaker* government
amid much political debate and pressure from the Americans for some reason.
This effectively ends Canada's attempts at becoming a powerhouse in
aviation technology.

***

On this day in *1962*, astronaut *John Glenn* becomes the first American to
orbit planet Earth, nearly a year after the Soviets launched kosmonaut *Yuri
Gagarin* into orbit. All together now: "We're Number Two! We're Number Two!"

***

Also on this day, in *1971*, the National Emergency Center mistakenly
orders all US radio and TV stations to switch from programming to Emergency
Alert, freaking out a whole lotta people for an entire half-hour before the
error is caught, and broadcasts are allowed to continue.

***

On this day in *1986*, the Soviet Union launches its *Mir* spacecraft.
Remaining in orbit for 15 years, it is occupied for 10 of those years.

***

On this day in *1987*, in Salt Lake City, a bomb explodes in a computer
store.

***

On this day in *2003*, a Pakistani Air Force plane crashed in a remote,
mountainous region, killing Air Force chief *Mushaf Ali Mir* and 16 others.
Aside from being one of our most important "allies" in the so-called "War
on Terror," the nation of Pakistan is also where the Taliban originated,
and still thrives, and is where Osama bin Laden was ultimately discovered
malingering in a hidey-spot. Further complicating things, Pakistan has been
tasked with simultaneously helping the hated Western "infidels" and holding
back an Iran-style popular fundamentalist Islamic revolution, at home.
Pakistan also has nuclear weapons, which sucks out loud when you consider
that they're pretty much all that stands between "the button" and millions
of *Osama*-loving fundamentalist lunatics who would love nothing better
than to vaporize India, then Israel, then as much of the USA as they
possibly can. You think car-bombs are bad? Wait'll you get a load of
car-nukes!

Also on this day in *2003*, in West Warwick, Rhode Island, concertgoers
expecting to re-live their hard-rockin' high school days by taking in a *Great
White* concert were instead sent screaming into the night by an
out-of-control pyrotechnics display. The all-wood building where the
concert was being held went up like a straw hat soaked in gasoline. Many
were trampled in the rush to escape. Others asphyxiated on the thick toxic
smoke. Still others were roasted alive where they stood. 99 people died,
including Great White's guitarist.

And also on this day in *2003* (again?!), a plane goes down in Iran,
killing 304 "elite" Iranian Revolutionary Guards.

***

On this day in *2009*, two Tamil Tigers aircraft packed with C4 explosives
en route to the national air force headquarters are shot down by the Sri
Lankan military before reaching their target, in a kamikaze style attack.
Wow. How come this is the first you're hearing about this craziness?!
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