Paracultural Calendar

[Mark Thibodeau]

<http://d1jqu7g1y74ds1.cloudfront.net/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/pioneer10.jpg>

On this day in *1373*, the Anglo-Portuguese Alliance between *England* and
*Portugal* is founded. It remains the oldest alliance in the world that is
still in force to this day.

***

On this day in *1525*, rogue German cleric *Martin Luther* marries *Katharina
von Bora*, against the celibacy rule decreed by the Roman Catholic Church
for priests and nuns. This perhaps helps explain his “Protestantism” to a
certain degree.

***

On this day in *1886*, one day after being deposed, Bavaria’s *“Mad” King
Ludwig II* is found dead in Lake Starnberg, in waist-deep water, along with
his personal physician. Both have unexplained wounds to their head and
shoulders.

***

On this day in *1934*, German fuhrer *Adolf Hitler* and Italian
generalissimo *Benito Mussolini* meet in Venice, Italy. Mussolini later
describes the German dictator as "a silly little monkey".

***

On this day in *1966*, the US Supreme Court rules in *Miranda v. Arizona* that
the police must inform suspects of their rights before questioning them,
much to their extreme displeasure.

***

On this day in *1971*, the *New York Times* begins publication of the *Pentagon
Papers <http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pentagon_Papers>*. Pretty heavy stuff.

***

On this day in the year *1981*, television host *Tom Snyder*
interviews *Charles
Manson* on his late-night program,*Tomorrow*. Viewers have a hard time
deciding which wildly gesticulating loon looks more deranged.

***

On this day in the year *1983*, America’s *Pioneer 10* space probe reaches
the outermost boundaries of our Solar System and slips into the inky black
nothingness of interstellar space. Yer old pal Jerky finds it strangely
comforting that -- even after the last, toxin-riddled member of our
suicidal species gurgles its final, pain-wracked breath -- these hunks of
metal we’ve sent hurtling through the cosmos will still be carving a path
through the void, blinking eternally, intergalactic proof that, yes, WE
ONCE WERE!

***

On this day in *2005*, a California jury finds faded pop phenom *Michael
Jackson* "not guilty" of ten charges stemming from allegations that he
molested a 13-year-old cancer patient two years before. When asked how he
was going to celebrate, a jubilant Jacko squealed: "I'm going to
Disneyland! And then, after picking up a vanload of hot dates, I'm going to
Neverland!"
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