PARACULTURAL CALENDAR FOR AUGUST 31

[Mark Thibodeau]

<http://www.independent.co.uk/incoming/article9804113.ece/alternates/w460/9-JackTheRipper1-Alamy.jpg>


On this day in *1888*, London's self-pronounced *Jack the Ripper* claims
his first victim, prostitute *Mary Ann Nichols*. Her mutilated corpse is
discovered in the Whitechapel section of London's rough-and-tumble East
End, and before too long, four more victims fall prey to his surgeon's
scalpels. Five dead prostitutes. That's a pretty paltry haul, when you stop
and think about our modern-day serial killers. Hell, the *Green River
Killer* probably scored ten times that many! And yer old pal Jerky hears
tell there are a couple of inbred Canadian pig farmers who could go through
five hookers during the average three-day weekend. We've come a long way,
baby! If, however, the *new theory
<http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2241334/Was-Chicago-doctor-serial-killer-Londons-Jack-Ripper-Descendant-American-murderer-investigates-links-notorious-criminals.html>*
that
Jack was really American psychopath *H.H. Holmes* turns out to be true, he
might well have been one of the most prolific murderers in the history of
mayhem, after all.

***

On this day in *1895*, German Count *Ferdinand von Zeppelin* patents his
Navigable Balloon.

***

On this day in the year *1955*, the first-ever solar-powered automobile is
demonstrated at a car show in Chicago. It was such a resounding
technological and aesthetic success that soon EVERYONE was driving a
solar-powered car. Today, it's hard to imagine a world without
solar-powered automobiles.

***

On this day in *1991*, the region of *Kyrgyzstan* declares its independence
from the Soviet Union.

***

On this day in *1997*, one year and two days after her divorce from *Prince
Charles* was finalized (and after she’d expressed fears that the Royals
would have her killed and make it look like an accident), *Diana*, Princess
of Wales, her companion *Dodi Fayed* and driver *Henri Paul* die in a car
crash in Paris.

***

On this day in *1935*, President *Franklin Delano Roosevelt *signs the
*Neutrality
Act*, a piece of legislation prohibiting the export of American-made arms
and munitions to belligerent nations. Over in Connecticut, the
Nazi-affiliated *Bush*clan sulks and pouts.
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