GR translation: unrecoverable dreams

[Mike Jing]

V415.16-22, P422.6-13   Days passed, much like one another to Pökler.
Identical morning plunges into a routine dreary as winter now. He learned
to keep an outward calm, at least. Learned to feel the gathering, the
moving toward war that is unique to weapons programs. At first it simulates
depression or non-specific anxiety. There may be esophagal spasms and
unrecoverable dreams. You find you are writing notes to yourself, first
thing in the morning: calm, reasoned assurances to the screaming mental
case inside—

What does "unrecoverable dreams" mean here?