unabomber haikus

[Bill R Sherman]

     I know that anybody signed up on a Pynchon list must be a bit of a 
     luddite and also have a pretty sick, and good, sense of humor, so here 
     are some forwarded Unabomber Haikus (I can't take credit for a word):
     
     
     >Technology bad
     >Please tell me you like my beard
     >Or I'll blow you up
     >
     >Fun, easygoing
     >single, white Unabomber
     >seeks same for love, laughs.
     >
     >Ed McMahon of death:
     >"You may already be a
     >winner! Open now!"
     >
     >Bad Unabomber!
     >Blowing people all to hell.
     >Do you take requests?
     >
     >Farewell to tenure
     >Sniping from the tower clock
     >already been done
     >
     >Why can't I get this
     >stupid computer to print?
     >Time to buy some stamps.
     >
     >Should I comb my hair
     >Or should I wear it matted
     >Judge prefers it combed
     >
     >Remember when you
     >Laughed at his fake fur parka?
     >He remembers, too.
     >
     >"Open your present..."
     >"No, you open your present..."
     >Kaczinski Christmas
     >
     >Its circumstantial
     >all that stuff in my cabin
     >I found it all. Yeah.
     >
     >My Daddy said BANG
     >When he taught me about sex.
     >I misunderstood.
     >
     >Ted's fate worse than death:
     >"You're assigned to prison shop.
     >Make computer chips."
     >