More Feetlebaum than you needed/wanted to know

[MASCARO at humnet.ucla.edu]

Thanks to Hugh S. for the complete lyrics to Feetlebaum.   But someone now hints at an 
alternate version.  Conspiracy touches all. 
 My request: Will some equally erudite person now post the complete Bonzo Dog Band 
*Outro* lyrics that include the lines:

*Adolf Hitler on vibes*

and

*Roy Rogers on Trigger*

I'd be grateful

john m
(or some webhead tell me if there's a Bonzo site? )

>
>And for those inquiring minds who really want to know...
>
>Feetlebaum/A Mudder's Day Sport Spectacular (S. Jones/D. Weaver
>[With the soothing sounds of "The William Tell Overture"]
>
>Anncr:  From Louisville, Kentucky -- in living color -- it's the Sports
>Special of the week.
>
>Weaver:  Good afternoon, all you fans of the Sport of Kings.
>We're here in Louisville for the running of the famous Ken-tucky Derby.
>Here in the Bluegrass State, it's a beautiful day for a race.
>[SFX: Thunder]
>Roundtable is a favorite today.  Hillsdale, even money.
>Turang (sp?), 3 to 1.  Poison Ivy has been scratched.
>And at 20 to 1, Feetlebaum
>
>Now the horses are approaching the starting gate.
>They're in the starting gate....
>The bell rings at the barrier.
>And there they go!
>
>And Round Table taking the lead.
>Hangover second on the rail.
>Turang third by a length.
>Hillsdale fourth.
>And Fee-tle-baum.
>
>Around the first turn, Roundtable holds his lead.
>Hangover is second by a head.
>Turang and Hillsdale are running close.
>Perry Como looks like a sleeper....
>And Fee-tle-baum.
>
>Going into the back stretch, it's a close race
>With Jayne Mansfield way out in front.
>Little Genella (sp?) second.
>College girl and college boy are neck-and-neck.
>Long underwear has fallen down behind.
>And Fee-tle-baum.
>
>At the half, the pace is fast and furious.
>Hillsdale. Turang.  Handkerchief is third by a nose.
>Lily Saint-Cere (??) is showing plenty.
>Raspberry is in a jam.
>Toupee is going on ahead.
>And in last place by 40 lengths....
>I believe it is... Yes, it is...
>Feetlebaum.
>
>Around the turn, heading for home,
>Wisdom Tooth is pulling out.
>Vic Tanny is muscling in.
>Gurgle in the stretch.  [Seal bark]
>And Mother-in-Law is moving in again.
>    (No, no!  Not that!)
>
>NOW, they're coming down to the wire.
>AND it's a close race.
>AND it's Number One.
>AND what a race this is.
>AND Number Four AND oh-ee-leven, the three-way winner.
>Have a hunch, bet a bunch.
>Don't be cheap, sleep in the street.
>AND they're closing in.
>AND I've never seen such a race!
>AND it's Car Number Twelve.
>Car Number Nine.
>         Ooo-- Wrong race!
>
>And I'm telling you, the crowd is going mad.
>They're coming down here.
>AND it's a great fight.
>And they're slugging.  They're punching.
>And they're fighting each other.
>AND he's got him by the nose.
>He's got him by the throat.
>AND there's blood all over the ring.
>There's blood all over the place.
>I don't know whose blood it is --
>    uhduhduhduhduh, It's mine!
>
>And there' goes the winner!!!
>Fee-tle-baum.
>