broken resolution

[Paul Mackin]

Every year for the last five years I've made a New Year's resolution to
break my addiction to the p-list. It's too time-consuming. I neglect
family and other duties on account of it (I'm always  being told).
And I agree--the p-list is bad for me. However my resolution to
quit never lasts more than a day or two. I have observed and talked
to others who have had the strength  and the resolve to kick the habit. 
I have seen them go on to lead happy productive lives. I feel their
joy but know it cannot be my own own. I have come to recognize at this
point in my life that I now longer am even trying to fight the addiction.
The damn thing is just too compelling, the dependency too great. The only
hope left is that the p-list will somehow evaporate from the face of the
earth. But I know this is an idle hope. It will not happen. It has gone on
too long. The p-list is indestructible. And I am doomed.

				P.