Breakfast for irish alter boys

[Terrance]

Mom says, "The navy taught my sons drink and profanity." 

But we know that the church taught us drink. We were alter
boys. After delivering 
 newspapers we hurried over to the church. We could get in
two  masses before classes. In those days we would drink
alter wine. We liked funerals best because we would miss a
class or two, drink a little wine, inhale the incense, and
get tips that exceeded the tips we could make in a week
delivering papers.