Paracultural Calendar for Jan 10, 2015

[Mark Thibodeau]

On this day in *49 BC*, Roman general *Julius Caesar* metaphorically
crosses the proverbial Rubicon by literally *crossing the Rubicon*.

***

On this day in *1776*, early American pamphleteer (that's kind of like a
prehistoric blogger) *Thomas Paine* publishes his masterpiece: *Common
Sense*, which you can read in its entirety *here
<http://www.earlyamerica.com/earlyamerica/milestones/commonsense/text.html>*
.

***

On this day in *1870*, industrial magnate and conspiracy theory magnet *John
D. Rockefeller *incorporates *Standard Oil*. Of the hundreds (if not
thousands) of wild theories that have sprung up around the Rockefeller
family over the years, some are credible, others not so much, and still
more have been proven true beyond the slightest shadow of a doubt. You're
going to have to decide for yourself which of these theories is which.

***

On this day in *1927*, German director *Fritz Lang*'s futuristic sf
masterpiece *Metropolis* is released.

***

On this day in *1929*, *The Adventures of Tintin*, one of the most popular
European comic books, is first published in Belgium.

***

On this day in *1946*, the US Army Signal Corps successfully conducts *Project
Diana*, bouncing radio waves off the moon and receiving the reflected
signals.

***

On this day in *1984*, aging bit-player *Clara Peller* first asks "Where's
the Beef?" in an advertising campaign for the Wendy's burger chain. Alas,
Clara's glorious, rocket-like rise to fame and fortune were cut short when
a fickle public turned their attention to some other old broad who had
fallen and could not get up. Meanwhile, in Washington, the USA and the
Vatican re-establish full diplomatic relations after almost 117 years of...
um... *not* having full diplomatic relations, I guess.

***

On this day in *1985*, Sandinista *Daniel Ortega* becomes president of
Nicaragua and vows to continue the transformation to socialism and alliance
with the Soviet Union and Cuba. American policy continues to support the
vile and murderous *Contras* in their revolt against the Nicaraguan
government.

***

On this day in *1990*, Time Inc. and Warner Communications merge, resulting
in the creation of media conglomerate multinational *Time Warner*.

***
*And now, a not-so-successful attempt at humor by Yours Truly...*

On this day in *1920*, in the wake of the horrors of *World War 1*, the
"Covenant of the League of Nations" is ratified by 42 nations, and the *League
of Nations* formally comes into being. After failing to prevent Imperial
Japan's invasion of China, Fascist Italy's invasion of Ethiopia, and Nazi
Germany's descent into genocidal madness, the League was officially
dissolved.

On this day in *1946*, in the wake of the horrors of *World War II*, the
"General Assembly of the United Nations" first convenes at Westminster
Central Hall in London, England, and the *United Nations* is born. After
failing to prevent the United States from launching an unnecessary
neoconservative businessman's war of first resort to forcibly remake the
Middle East as a center of Western-style, loan-taking liberal capitalist
democracy in the early 21st century, the UN lost pretty much all
credibility, and today is on the fast track towards being dissolved.

On this day in *2087*, in the wake of the horrors of *World War IX*, the
*Objectivist Psychotrust* will be selected by a planet-wide brainwave poll,
and the *Council for Rational Arbitration* will formally come into being.
After failing to prevent *#640123018923* from conducting research into
sub-atomic femtobot dimorphism, the planet will dissolve into a shimmering
soupy ball of rainbow-colored quantum goo... or something.
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