Paracultural Calendar for Jan 14

[Mark Thibodeau]

On this day in *1639*, the state of Connecticut adopts *Rodger Ludlow*'s
constitution, which he entitles the *Fundamental Orders*. One of these
orders is that the peoples who inhabit "the River of Connectecotte and the
lands thereunto adjoining" be given the right to "liberty of speech."
Unfortunately, the document also give the Governor and various state
representatives the right "to silence unseasonable and disorderly
speakings." Unseasonable speakings? What the fuck does that mean? No
talking about snowshoes in July?

***

On this day in *1794*, *Dr. Jessee Bennet* of Edom, Virginia, performs the
first ever successful *Cesarean Section* operation on his own wife.
Afterwards, he chops up the placenta, throws it into a bowl with some
Romaine lettuce, bread crumbs, egg-whites and anchovies, thereby creating
the world's first *Cesarean Salad*.

***

On this day in *1896*, Italian immigrant *Carlo Ponzi* arrives in America
and begins the world's first *pyramid scheme
<http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ponzi_scheme>*, inspiring a generation of
Multi-Level-Marketing "businesses" like *Herbalife *and *Amway*, wherein
selling products isn't really the point. Rather, you sell *other people* the
right to sell *other people* the right to sell *other people* the
products... eventually, somewhere down the line. When the scam fizzled out
- as all such scams must eventually do, by simple rules of mathematics -
Ponzi was deported back to Italy in *1934*, where *Benito Mussolini* gave
him a high position in the government's financial sector, where he promptly
embezzled a fortune and escaped to Brazil, where he died in *1949*.

***

On this day in *1943*, President *Franklin D. Roosevelt* becomes the first
President of the United States to travel by airplane while in office when
he travels from Miami to Morocco to meet with *Winston Churchill*.

***

On this day in the year *1938*, a gang of morbid, misanthropic goofs get
together in New York and decide to form the *National Society for the
Legalization of Euthanasia*. Their stated goals? *1)*To make sure a quick
and painless death is available to anyone who wants or needs it. *2)* To
increase awareness and acceptance of the practice of "mercy killing" as has
long been practiced in secret by physicians and caregivers the world over.
*3)* Freak out their parents and neighbors, by any means necessary.

***

On this day in *1939*, after every other country in the world takes a pass,
Norway claims a territory - "Queen Maud Land" - on the frozen continent of
Antarctica.

***

On this day in *1967*, the Human Be-In, takes place in San Francisco,
California's Golden Gate Park, launching the *Summer of Love*.

***

On this day in *1973*, *Elvis Presley*'s concert *Aloha from Hawaii* is
broadcast live via satellite, and sets the record as the most watched
broadcast by an individual entertainer in television history.

***

On this day in *1975*, teenage heiress *Lesley Whittle* is kidnapped by *Donald
Neilson*, aka "the Black Panther". The details of Whittle's confinement and
ultimately, her murder, are *absolutely chilling
<http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2078229/Why-Donald-Neilson-k-Black-Panther-died-week-aged-75-chilling-killers-criminal-history.html>*
.

***

On this day in *1990*, *The Simpsons* premieres on FOX.

***

On this day in *2004*, the national flag of the Republic of Georgia, the
so-called "five cross flag", is restored to official use after a hiatus of
some 500 years.

***

On this day in *2005*, the *Huygens probe* - launched from the *Cassini*
*orbiter* two weeks earlier - lands on Saturn's moon Titan, giving us an
astonishing video and audio record to marvel at. If only for this, I am
glad Youtube exists. And yes, I know we ran this same video two weeks ago
in commemoration of the orbiter launch, but who cares? If you missed it
then, watch it now. If not... watch it again! It's that good.
-------------- next part --------------
An HTML attachment was scrubbed...
URL: <http://waste.org/pipermail/pynchon-l/attachments/20150114/c82ec117/attachment.html>