Paracultural Calendar for Jan 18

[Mark Thibodeau]

America's first recorded *UFO sighting* happens on this day in *1644*, when
a bunch of Boston Pilgrims report seeing a strange glowing object in the
night sky. Later that same night, they burn a few witches, just to be on
the safe side.

***

On this day in *1788*, the First Fleet arrives at Botany Bay in Australia
from England, carrying 736 convicts... the rough common soil from which all
future generations of Ozzies would sprout.

***

On this day in *1911*, pilot *Eugene B. Ely* lands on the deck of the USS
Pennsylvania stationed in San Francisco Bay, the first time an aircraft
landed on a ship.

***

The American military begins spraying Agent Orange on the Vietnamese jungle
on this day in*1962*, in a failed attempt to reveal the Viet Cong
guerrillas who'd been using the dense foliage as cover. Flipper-babies
ensue.

***

On this day in *1967*, Boston Strangler *Albert DeSalvo* is convicted of
numerous crimes and is sentenced to life imprisonment.

***

On this day in *1974* *The Six Million Dollar Man* premiered on ABC TV. One
year later, *All in the Family* spin-off *The Jeffersons* makes its debut
on CBS. Still another year after that, the two shows would combine creative
teams to film a pilot for a whole new concept in action/comedy TV:*The Six
Million Dollar Black Man*. It failed miserably... because racism.

***

After being embraced by the gay community, the AIDS charity song *That's
What Friends Are For*reaches the top of the charts on this day in *1986*.
Gays didn't care much for the record's now forgotten b-side - *That's What
Friends AREN'T For* - featuring a *Ronald Reagan* sound-a-like imploring
"you people" to "abstain from unprotected anal sex", over a military band's
instrumental rendition of *America the Beautiful*.

***

On this day in *1990*, Washington DC mayor *Marion Barry* is arrested
during a joint sting operation by the FBI and DC police. After being
arrested, he is charged with drug possession and the use of crack cocaine.
After trial, he was sentenced to six months in prison for possession. By
*1994*, Barry was back as mayor for an unprecedented fourth term. He
remained mayor until *1999*, when he retired and moved to the countryside
where he lives to this day in a house made entirely out of crack.

***

On this day in *1991*, the United States government acknowledges the *CIA* had
forked out over three hundred thousand dollars to Panamanian dictator *Manuel
Noriega* for a variety of services rendered. The American people
momentarily wonder "Who?" - then shrug and go back to watching*Dynasty* or
whatever the fuck mind-destroying crap was on TV back then.

***

On this day in the year *1996*, Scientology priestess and daughter of the
King of Rock, *Lisa Marie Presley* files for divorce from Underoo-snorting
King of Pop, *Michael Jackson*. You know, if two sweet kids like this can't
make a go of it in this hard-boiled, workaday world, then what chance do
*any* of us have?!
-------------- next part --------------
An HTML attachment was scrubbed...
URL: <http://waste.org/pipermail/pynchon-l/attachments/20150118/f37d56b9/attachment.html>