twerp in cornell

[David Morris]

Very funny!  I'd love to see Mr V do this on video.

David Morris

On Wed, Nov 21, 2018 at 3:27 PM Jochen Stremmel <jstremmel at gmail.com> wrote:

> INTERVIEWER
>
> What is a twerp in the strictest sense, in the original sense?
>
> VONNEGUT
>
> It’s a person who inserts a set of false teeth between the cheeks of his
> ass.
>
> INTERVIEWER
>
> I see.
>
> VONNEGUT
>
> I beg your pardon; between the cheeks of his or *her* ass. I’m always
> offending feminists that way.
>
> INTERVIEWER
>
> I don’t quite understand why someone would do that with false teeth.
>
> VONNEGUT
>
> In order to bite the buttons off the backseats of taxicabs. That’s the only
> reason twerps do it. It’s all that turns them on.
>
> INTERVIEWER
>
> You went to Cornell University after Shortridge?
>
> VONNEGUT
>
> I imagine.
>
> INTERVIEWER
>
> You imagine?
>
> VONNEGUT
>
> I had a friend who was a heavy drinker. If somebody asked him if he’d been
> drunk the night before, he would always answer offhandedly, “Oh, I
> imagine.” I’ve always liked that answer. It acknowledges life as a dream.
> Cornell was a boozy dream, partly because of booze itself, and partly
> because I was enrolled exclusively in courses I had no talent for. My
> father and brother agreed that I should study chemistry, since my brother
> had done so well with chemicals at M.I.T. He’s eight years older than I am.
> Funnier, too. His most famous discovery is that silver iodide will
> sometimes make it rain or snow.
> --
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>