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[John Rigney]

Following is a content analysis of the roughly seventeen responses to Gary
Elshaw's posting of the Lord's Prayer in Ebonics:

DISCLOSURE

I am white, college-educated.  I don't think the Simpsons or Seinfeld are
funny.  I didn't laugh at the Ebonics version of the Lord's Prayer, but I
have laughed heartily at other Ebonics translations on the Web. The Ebonics
translation of The Rime of the Ancient Mariner is almost as much fun to read
as Coleridge's version.  I have read Pynchon-l longer than any of those
mentioned below have posted in it.  This is my first post.

FINDING #1: NARCISSISTS ALL OF US

The postings to Pynchon-l have less to do with Pynchon (or Ebonics) than
they do with the narcissism of the posters.  I know that you all know this,
but you don't often admit it.  


FINDING #2: ELITISM REARS ITS UGLY, UGLY HEAD

The cliques of frequent posters to specific lists are among the most elitist
(not elite) sociological groups in the country.  For proof you need go no
further than John Mascaro's post of February 19 in which he referred to Gary
as the "lurker Gary E."  Now THAT, boys and girls, was offensive.


OBSERVATION: "BLACK ENGLISH" and "EBONICS" ARE NOT SYNONYMOUS

There are patterns in Black English that scream ignorance just as loudly as
other patterns do in "Redneck English."  It is the suggestion of ignorance
found in Black English, and not the curiosity of different language patterns
found in Ebonics, that handicaps those who speak Black English. What is
offered as an Ebonics translation of the Lord's Prayer is actually a Black
English translation.


OBSERVATION: NOT ALL JOKES ABOUT BLACK PEOPLE ARE RACIST

The fact that a joke is made at the expense of black people does not make it
ipso facto racist.  Jokes made at the expense of black people based on
characteristics over which they have control are fair game -- jokes based on
characteristics over which they have no control are not. Consequently, jokes
about the shape of a black person's nose would be offensive; jokes about a
black person's taste in music would not be offensive.   


FINDING #3: PEOPLE WHO CHERISH TRADITIONAL PRAYERS HAVE MORE CAUSE THAN
BLACK PEOPLE TO TAKE OFFENSE

I could not find one word suggesting that the translation of The Lord's
Prayer into Ebonics might have been offensive to those who were fond of that
prayer in its original form.  If Bonnie Kyburz had been truly sensitive to
the opportunity for the original posting to create offense, she should have
worried about these people.

Recommendation: If any of the posters critical of the joke is black,
that/those poster(s) need to publicly apologize to religious people for
suggesting that the parody was more offensive to black people than to
religious people. 


FINDING #4: BONNIE KYBURZ -- MOTORMOUTH

Bonnie needs to hear a real hate speech.  My guess is that she knows that
jokes are not hate speeches and was just shooting off her mouth.  However,
her second post was more offensive than her first.  In the second post, she
offered an apology to "anyone offended by (her) comments."  This was clearly
a sop thrown to her fellow frequent-posters, who had registered disagreement
with her earlier tirade.  She never did apologize to Gary Elshaw directly,
despite having called him a public racist.  At the end of her second post,
she guessed that she should just keep it personal.  Bonnie, please do.

Recommendation: Burn a cross on this woman's lawn, and then tell her it was
just a joke.


FINDING #5: JOHN MASCARO -- SIMPLISTIC YAHOO

John Mascaro -- what a piece of work!  John admitted having 'shotgunned'
Gary E. He offers the same kind of apology that Bonnie did -- "if I seemed
too harsh."  John knew he was too harsh on Gary Elshaw, but immediately
after this little "apology," he trashed Gary even more viciously.  Clearly
his apology was not directed to Gary.  It was directed to Bonnie and Henry
and the others in his clique who may have felt that he was "a little too
harsh."  And just in case a reader may have misunderstood, and assumed that
he was apologizing to Gary, he spells it out -- "I imagined (Gary) on the
basis of his text.  I don't think my imagination was unjustified, given what
i took as the evidence."

Recommendation: Force-feed this guy a tube of Preparation H every day for
the rest of his life.


FINDING #6: HENRY M -- ONE BRICK SHY OF A LOAD

Henry M.  Dear Lord, what is there to say about Henry M?  Let's just say
that if John Mascaro wants to put modifiers in front of people's names, he
might try "dim-witted Henry M."  Henry M needs to apologize to blacks for
the spade is a spade "joke"; apologize to academics for the ya bunch of
fruits "joke"; and apologize to all reasonable people for insisting that
"what makes the joke itself racist is that it it's (sic) "humor" is
one-dimensional at most."   Hello?   Your lights are on, Henry dear, but
there's NOBODY home.     

Recommendation: Double this man's dose.


FINDING #7: DAVID CASSERES -- DUH...

David Casseres -- certainly not a full-bore asshole like you-know-who, but
David, lighten up.  You don't have to tell us that racism is not funny.  We
know that, and we know a lot of other things that are not funny -- starting
with Henry M.  You want not funny, Henry's got lots...  

Recommendation:  Make David read Dinesh d'Souza's The End of Racism.  Test
him on it so he can't cheat.  


FINDING #8: DEEDLE -- TRULY A CLASS ACT

Deedle -- a class act.  He let everyone know how he felt in a much more
dignified way than I have, for sure...

Recommendation:  Read when this guy writes.



AFTERNOTE:  If, by some utterly unjustifiable misinterpretation of my
comments, anyone were to take offense at any of my comments, I apologize if
any of my remarks could be construed to suggest that JOHN MASCARO is lower
than fucking POND SCUM because clearly that would be up to the reader to
determine, wouldn't it, and just because HENRY M's mother didn't know
exactly which of the Green Bay Packers was his father is no reason to hold
that against this BOTTOM-FEEDER FROM HELL, and I guess I hope that no one
took offense at any of my observations about that DUMPSTER-DIVER BONNIE KYBURZ.